As I sit here reflecting on some disturbing stories...
... I recently heard from my children about girls and young women desperately photoshopping their photos to be "Insta-worthy," I feel sad, embarrassed, and humiliated as a woman.
The extreme importance of looks in our culture gives me a sense of frustration and anger as well. Why do we place such a high and frankly, threatening, value on appearance?
If a woman doesn't conform to societal beauty standards, she's often dismissed as a frump. It's disheartening to see how much emphasis we place on looks and appearances rather than on 'essence.'
To me, elegance is not a moral issue.
While it's nice to see someone who radiates confidence in their personal style, not everyone has the privilege of expressing themselves in that way or maybe doesn't feel confident in their own style because it's different from what is 'in.'
In fact, the pressure to conform to narrow standards of beauty has held me back from sharing myself with the world. I've felt insecure and afraid of being judged, all because I don't fit the mold of what society deems stylish or professional.
It's an inner sense that many of us struggle with - the belief that we have to look a certain way, act a certain way, and conform to certain expectations to be accepted and valued.
What if we could find that harmonious resonance for ourselves when looks truly reflect our inner selves...
... and if our looks don't feel pleasant, inquire within and help ourselves feel better.
Maybe that will reveal that it would feel really nice to have a haircut or a pedicure, so we will feel better and look better, but not because we are driven by shame or a superiority complex.
What if we recognized and appreciated the natural beauty in every soul and helped each other to feel better and better about ourselves? And what if we could include ourselves in this kindness?
I know it's easier said than done. I still struggle with my self-image often, especially as I'm getting older.
But I believe that if we can support each other and ourselves to show up as our true, authentic selves, without too much pretense, we can start to shift the culture toward a more accepting and inclusive mindset/heart-set.
For me, that means embracing my natural style, wearing what I like and what's comfortable instead of feeling that there is something wrong with me because I don't constantly buy new clothes, dye my hair, or put makeup on myself.
It means recognizing that my worth as a person isn't tied to my appearance and that I have just as much to offer the world whether I'm wearing makeup or not or dye my hair.
I don't like wearing makeup or dyeing my hair. What you see is what you get. Maybe it's part of my lifelong 'Truth-Quest'... 🙂
How about you? What are your thoughts? What makes you mad? What is your experience? Let me know in the comments below.
Remember, you were born for such a time as this... as an elemental and experiential being. What you feel IS your life, your inner (felt) sense, or somatic experience of yourself.
Sending you love and unconditional acceptance.
Much love,
Ildikó <3
wow…this is so true for me as well. I have felt tremendous pressure around outward appearances since I can remember. it is debilitating and destructive if we subscribe to that mindset. it is also unsustainable since we all age.
Yes, totally agree… programmed /inherited mindsets have very deep roots in our bodies and minds, and often deep healing is necessary to fully de-activate them… as you know <3